Bag Lady Does Britain’s got Talent

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SMart regular, The Bag Lady of Paddington Green, recently set her sights on the famous Oval Cricket Ground. No, she wasn’t intending to trade her bags for wickets but felt this overwhelming passion to promote SMart via the ITV’s iconic talent show.

The last of the Open Auditions was held at the Oval on January 19 amid icy and snow covered streets in sub zero temperatures. At this stage the auditions were not in front of the renowned TV judges but researchers/producers instead. Having sat around for some 3 hours in a holding area, the Bag Lady (attired in new red hat, adorned with plastic flowers, and apparel sourced from a local builder’s skip) merrily strutted her stuff before a BGT researcher… who was already displaying clear signs that she was both weary and harassed from a previous contestant. She gave little away in her reaction to the Old Bag and only allowed 1 min – 30 seconds of the 2 minute performance; time limit rules!

Maureen Grayson as the Bag Lady

Maureen Grayson as the Bag Lady

At the end, she asked a few questions; the most memorable, directed to the Bag Lady, quote: So what was it that made you want to audition for Britain’s Got Talent?

To which the Bag Lady replied, “Well, Simon Cowell said he was bored and wanted ‘different’. So I’m just giving him DIFFERENT!

Exit Bag Lady after passing on a copy of SMart Magazine. The poor soul has heard nothing more from Britain’s Got Talent so far!

Clearly they do not know ‘Talent’ when they see it. – Ed. 

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